Friday, 7 August 2015

We are getting there.... slowly

So the death certificate was issued, there was no need to do a post mortem and today, Tom was moved from hospital to the Funeral home. We dropped some clothes off for him and picked up 3 rings that he's worn for years, his Mum's, his Grandma's and Aunty Alice on Joan's side.

Then we were told that the funeral could take place next Thursday. Thank goodness we thought, but hang on a minute, the only appointment we could get at the registrar's office to register the death was also Thursday. 

In that case then, the funeral director informed us, it couldn't take place until the week after. They have to be in possession of the death certificate for 2 days before any burial or cremation can take place. 

Which meant that as they were already fully booked on Monday and Tuesday didn't suit Tom's sister because she plays bingo and it's the only day of the week she goes out, we opted for Wednesday 19th August.

We really have no objection to Aunty Betty's weekly bingo bonanza. Regular readers may remember Tom told Betty to make sure her husband's funeral wasn't on a Wednesday as he always went to Bury. She willingly obliged so we have done the same for her.

In between thinking how ridiculously long funerals seem to take to organise in the UK I'm actually finding the formalities of them very interesting.



  1. it does seem to take forever. When my nan died a few years back it took ages for my mum to get the funeral sorted out and to actually happen.

    But you're getting there. x

  2. Things are definitely moving now. At least we have a date now and the Vicar is coming to see us on Wednesday. xx

  3. It does seem like a very long time to be able to register a death and then wait even longer for the funeral. Its different here in the states. Goes much more quickly with funerals usually held within 3-4 days. Even with a sudden death(autopsy required) of my son's friend it was just 6 days. Thursday eve to Wed. afternoon which I thought was amazing since it included the weekend.
    I wonder are there fewer funeral homes in Britain? The funeral director takes care of all the paper work here so no need to register a death. The differences are interesting to me.

    1. It is really interesting how different countries deal with funerals. The coroner, funeral director and the Vicar have all said there is a lot more paperwork to do now since the Harold Shipman saga - a Doctor who was found guilty of killing his patients - have a google.

      I'm not sure about the number of funeral homes. In Middleton we have two and there are around 45,000 residents. How would that compare to where you live?

      I think we might be getting a bit more Americanised though. 20 years ago our family buried 4 relatives within 3 years and there were no photos on any of their coffins. These days it seems the normal thing to do, but I've only ever seen it in America although I'm happy to be corrected if that's not the case. As you say, it's interesting what other countries do. xx

  4. It's the same as Candace said, here in Canada. Everything done and taken care of within a few days. Anything government related the funeral home takes care of. Family only has to take care of things like private pension notification and credit card cancellation and stuff like that. Last Wednesday my 4 siblings and I were able to finally get together and put my parents in the columbarium at the cemetery. I'd never heard that word before but it's a wall with niches that the urns go inside. One of my brothers said that they are in their final condo!! It's in a really nice setting with flowers and rose bushes around-my dad picked it out. Mum passes away 4 years ago in June and my dad last November. It was a beautiful day after 2 days of torrential rain and hail the 2 days prior. I hope when you finally are able to have the funeral everything goes smoothly.

    1. Hi Janice. I'm beginning to think the UK holds the world record for longest time between deaths and funerals. As I've said to Candace it all seems to stem from Harold Shipman - a Doctor who was found guilty of killing his patients.

      We seem to have to do a lot more organising here than you and that's before we start on pensions etc. And everybody needs an 'official' death certificate before anything can get sorted out.

      Columbarium - I've also learnt a new word lol. It sounds a lovely place and it must be nice to know it's where your Dad wanted to go with your Mum. Tom wanted his ashes scattered on the grave where his Grandma, Grandad, Mum and his little brother who died aged 8 are buried.

      I'm sorry to hear both your parents have passed. My sister-in-law has lost both her parents and at 42 is head of the household, if you know what I mean. xx

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