Sunday, 28 June 2015

84 Today!

The birthday party went well and Tom seemed to enjoy the get together. Even Joan was happy to comply and didn't fret too much when the taxi came for us, although I think the promise of grandchildren and chocolate eclairs at the other end helped. 

The staff had set the room up lovely for us. This is the bar where the residents can go and have a drink if they want to and where they hold their quiz nights etc. They'd put banners up and set the tables with cloths, glasses, napkins and vases of flowers. The weather was gorgeous so we were able to open the doors onto the patio as well. 

It wasn't long before Joan spotted the big chocolate cake and asked for a piece, so we sang 'Happy Birthday' pretty much as soon as Tom arrived. Even though I'd only put 10 candles on he struggled to blow them out so Mark had to help.

When everybody had gone he said to Mark "the best bit of the day was seeing Joan". If you knew Tom you'd know those few words are a true declaration of love. 
The whole thing lasted about 3 hours and by the end of it he was shattered. He's been feeling a bit out of sorts for a few days now and his breathing seems to be more laboured lately.

Anyway, today was much quieter for him. Just Mark and myself popped up to see him and he seemed quite at home sat in his chair watching TV surrounded by all his presents and cards that he'd been given.

Another good memory for Number 38's blog diary.

xxx











10 comments:

  1. Aw Suzanne, this post made me tear up. I got all emotional. Babe it's because it's my beloved Nanna's birthday today, she'd have been 101 today. She's been gone 8 years now. Treasure every second x

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    1. We will certainly treasure every day BABE lol. Happy Birthday to your Nanna even though she's no longer with you. It's a funny situation to be in when you do things like this, enjoying the moment, but at the back of your mind knowing in all probability it will be the last birthday Tom has. It was a lovely day even though I think he found it a bit overwhelming. xx

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  2. And then the word 'babe' appeared and made me laugh!! Damned iPad, I meant MAYBE!

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    1. Don't worry BABE :) The Headteacher used to text me and her messages were completely nonsensical because she used predictive text. No kidding 9/10 times I would have to ring her and ask what she meant. She really should have just called in the first place but she loved texting. xx

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  3. Its too bad that they can't have them both in the same facility that covers all levels of care. Even if they were on different floors they could visit each other more often.

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    1. Being in the same home would be perfect although definitely on different levels as Joan became very demanding of Tom at the end. Before we started looking at homes I thought each one took anybody but they all cater for different needs. So there are residential, nursing and dementia. There are possibly others that cover different needs as well. For Joan it doesn't really matter, she won't even remember going to the party and at the moment Mark takes Tom to visit her whenever he wants to go. The difficulty will come later on when Tom is perhaps unable to do the journey. xx

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  4. aw, I'm glad a splendid time was had by all. As people get older, they do struggle with getting worn out. My MIL turned 90 in December, and so an afternoon tea at her house was planned, with friends and various other people in her life as well as family. The house was pretty full. She was a bit overwhelmed. I overheard her whispering (loudly, loud enough to be heard) 'I just want to go to bed, I just want to go to bed'. Things wrapped up pretty quickly after that. Shame, because when I first met her she would have been in her late 70's, and absolutely LOVED big family occasions.
    Sad how things change.
    x

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    1. The tea party sounds lovely. It is sad how things change. We used to have loads of family gatherings here - it really was a case of any excuse for a get together - and Tom loved coming to them. Quite often he'd be the first to arrive and the last to leave! As they get older though you can tell anything out of their normal routine is too much for them to handle really. It's also scary what a difference a few years can make. You wouldn't recognise Tom and Joan from how they were only 5 years ago. xxx

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  5. Looks like the birthday boy had a great time celebrating his special day with his people. And you're right, another lovely memory for everyone to store.

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  6. It was a lovely day and he seemed to enjoy it. He was a lot quieter than usual but I think he was a bit overwhelmed by it all. I did wonder if he was sat there thinking "will this be my last one", but I made a point of telling him he wouldn't be having a party every year and this one was because Joan had had one at the home on her birthday. xx

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